Pi - A big Bye

I was waiting to post this today as today is an unique day… Pi Approximation day (22/7)… There are many lectures and events going on to celebrate this day, I thought I’ll chip in too and do my bit 

In a classroom there is always a section (20%) with students who are too good at maths.. The kids whose mothers and teachers will proudly title them as “Next Ramanujam”. They will participate in all Maths Olympiads and other competitions proving the statement. In short perfect IIT material.

Next 40% is a section that are not good with numericals and they are not scared to accept it. Though they’ll be termed “brats” and the notorious gang in the class, they won’t be bothered. In fact they’ll be proud as they can use this power and title to bully the fellow student and get their jobs done. This section is the perfect politician material for future India 

The next section (40%) is a very important set. This set will always be ignored and will either be clubbed with the 1st section (by mistake) or the second section (by partial mistake). This is the section that has students who do maths but still don’t like numericals. They are scared to accept that and enter the 2nd section as they want that goody-goody tag. But clearly know they don’t fit in the 1st section too. This set is a perfect material for future “Indian Janata”… Scared to declare what they feel and go ahead with what others feel for them 

In India, right from pre-schooling we are brought up showing the 1st section “To-be Ramanujams” and instructed to be like them. If you like maths you are a brilliant, extra ordinary, amazing… Am at loss of superlatives  If you say you don’t like maths, the elders will look at you with a reaction that occurs when a cockroach is seen 

So, I belong to this “Indian Janata” section  Though I used to score well in Maths, I never used to like it (Even today my mom gives me a don’t-tell that stare)… My teachers and relatives classified me in the 1st section and when I used me among the “To-be Ramanujams” I used to sit like  seeing them jump with answers while I would then only be starting off with 5 in the mind and 3 in the hand stuff 

In our school, the teachers used to check the rough column too  I didn’t have the habit of doing anything rough in that 3 hrs… After repeated instructions (rather warnings ), I started following this technique. I’ll finish off my exam phata-phat and will be decorating my rough column with numbers all over so that it’ll be difficult to decipher and teachers will assume I follow their instructions diligently 

The fun part will be during exams in higher classes… I’ll finish off my paper and when I look around , I’ll see my friends desperately searching the log book for something and pressing the buttons of the calculator with full josh…  I would never have used both all through the paper.. I used to again look into my question paper to check whether I have missed out something  The worst part will be when the invigilator comes up to me, throws a suspicious glance and asks whether I don’t want any log book  Sometimes they used to stand near me and read my paper. I used to hate it and will start drawing lines, margins and keep turning the sheets. They’ll get irritated and leave… Then I used to continue writing from where I left To avoid such unnecessary commotion I used to simply get the log book (even if I don’t need it ) and keep searching… just to show off 

This continued all through my schooling and in Engineering, even when I declared I am not comfortable with numbers, people used to laugh at me as if I cracked the biggest joke They didn’t believe and I was made a part of the 1st section as always… While we were preparing for campus interviews (aptitude tests), people used to come to me for cracking a problem. Though I used to somehow crack it (I told you I belong to that section that never accepts about its mathsphobia ),  I used to break my head and turn the room upside down to find the answer.

Thank God! CTS didn’t have maths papers as part of dovetail… else the pretension would have continued :roll:  So, now why did I start all these… Hee Hee Hee  I don’t know… Just to tell that Pi is a big bye-bye in my life 

God Particle- Kids' Version

Today, all of a sudden, while talking to my friends I mentioned about “God” particle, I was reminded of this cute incident. I felt like blogging something, so why not about this God-ly particle that made everybody talk .

Few kids were playing near my house and I was observing them for a while. All of a sudden, these kids gathered around a place. I was curious to know what is it and moved closer to them. The guy who was considered to be the most intelligent one… His looks justified it… Round glasses, serious no-nonsense look and a commanding voice. Perfect Professor, I thought.Others watched him in rapt attention.

Our Professor was busy in observing something on the ground and the other kids were busy observing him. One kid from the gang lost his patience and went on to touch that thing on the ground. “HEEEEYYYY” Everybody shouted in chorus and his hand pulled back in immediate reflex. Our Geeky Prof gave him a stern look for breaking the unspoken rules… The same look that’s given to the brat of the class…

Taking this as a lesson, another kid, this time, a girl,  asked our professor polietely “Can we touch it? What is it?” Professor immediately nodded his head in straight refusal without any second thoughts. He went on to add “If u touch it… Your hands will not move… It will get frozen… Then its your wish” I could see terror in the eyes of the girl. Everybody moved a step back after the comment, our professor continued to stay near, unperturbed …

I couldn’t stop giggling. He looked down upon those kids and threw an open question “So what do you think it is?” Just like in class, a little girl raised her hand, waiting for our prof’s permission to speak out. Upon getting the slight nod she went on to tell “Its a kind of virus that spreads disease”. I was wondering virus discovered without microscope… Wow 

This answer made everybody crawl even more back. Professor disapproved it and said “anybody else?” A puny little boy whispered in a hoarse  tone… “May be a magical stone”… Professor – “Please I don’t want any Harry Potter stories here”… “Any other valid ones”. This made that puny guy drop his bat down with full force, showing his frustration but our professor wouldn’t care about this.

“Okay, I myself will explain about this… This is God-particle… Scientists have found it recently…” I was completely taken aback by his answer… I never expected our Professor to rediscover the God particle.

He continued “It is directly from God… When God brushes the dust on his dress , these particles fall down…” All were listening to him with wide open eyes… The curious guy questioned “If its coming from God why shouldn’t we touch it?” The prof replied “Its were powerful… You cannot take that power… You need special gloves to touch it or your hands will be frozen (he meant paralyzed) forever…”

The cute girl whose eyes was still fixed on that particle asked “What dress will God wear?” I found it to be a logical question. The curious boy snubbed her saying sarcastically “Definitely not a white frock with red dots “(the dress she was wearing), mocking her voice and tone… Uffff! Guys are guys always  I couldn’t hold back my smile. Another girl replied “Haven’t you watched movies, he’ll wear very expensive clothes… Million times more expensive than what mamma buys”… Now everyone understood the magnitude… 

It was a puny guy’s turn now “What do we do now… Shall I call my dad?” The professor took control… “Don’t panic… I can handle it alone…” He ordered seeing one of  them… “Go get a polythene cover” and to another “A mug of water”.

Immediately the white-frock-with-red-dots girl and the puny boy ran in different directions and came in no time with the required items.

The professor instructed everybody to move away… He slowly and carefully wrapped his hand in the cover and when he was about to touch it, the kids screamed “Hey don’t” Our brave professor didn’t hear, which made everybody close their ears anticipating some blast or something…

As if he is diffusing a bomb, he carefully dropped it in the mug of water and called the mission, a success… “Now that we have dropped it in water, its energy is diffused.” The curious boy “Can we touch it now”… Prof “Not now… May be after a week… Then it will be fully weak” (I found the rhyme, to be great   )

So the group of scientists led by the professor carefully carried it away… I stopped them and suppressing my giggle asked them “what is it”… The curious boy explained everything in detail to me.

I asked the professor “What are you going to do with this”

Prof “Am going let it stay like this without disturbance for a week and then take it to school to my science teacher .”

Me: “Who told you its God particle?”

Prof: “I know… I saw it in paper and dad also told.” All kids agreed in unison

I just put my hand in the mug and took it out in a jiffy… All the kids looked at my hand to see whether it was frozen(paralyzed). The prof spoke in a defensive tone now “Since its in water, its energy is diffused. I replied “Its just a pebble but with a shiny coat.” All gave him a ready-to-kill look. So I tried saving him “Hold on… He’s not fully wrong. Something called God particle is found.” This made our professor beam proudly.

Still there was a bit of doubt on everybody’s face… So I had the pebble on my palm and asked them to touch it. Everybody hesitated but the curious boy who had always wanted to touch it, stepped forward and took it from my hand. “See, nothing happened to him”.

The professor shot back “So then what’s God particle?” I comfortably sat on a low parapet, taking my time to form my answer… I made the white-frock-with-red-dots girl sit on my lap  and the other kids made themselves comfortable nearby.

I was sure if I take the word sub-atomic particle, mass and stuffs they are not going to understand anything. I started (Remember, its the kid’s version… So if any mistakes, don’t mind) “Universe was formed trillions and trillions of years ago… As you all know, humans, that’s us, didn’t exist then. So scientists now, decided to find how this was possible. Universe is made of many tiny particles that we cant see. This wall, your shirt, everything has these kind of particles (I meant atoms that have protons, neutrons).”

The girl looked back and asked “Is it dust?” I smiled and continued “No, its tinier than that… It cannot be seen without powerful microscope. So, by finding out most of the particles that were present, the puzzle about universe was getting slowly solved for the scientists. There was this one particular particle left out to solve the mystery. And now, the scientists have found that particle too. That’s God particle.”

The professor asked me, “Why is it called God particle?” I can’t tell them a scientist, remarked “Goddamn particle”… As I wouldn’t be able to explain that term to them… So I told them “Since they were not able to find them, out of frustration, one of them remarked ‘ God! Particle’ and from then on its called God particle, though its real name is ‘Higgs Boson’. ”

They nodded as if they understood what I told. But I was happy, I was able to atleast make them understand its something that we cannot see and not this pebble.

P.S. : This is absolutely a kids’ version… Kindly overlook the mistakes if any 

Do we really have a choice?

I was getting home after the day’s work… Its a 5 min walk to my home from the place where the bus drops me…. During the walk, there are umpteen number of houses and from every house I was welcomed by the “Ta Da da Ta da da daa” tune reminding me its 9… Time for Surya to appear in Tamil version of “Kaun Banega Crorepathi”.

When I was in schooling Kaun Banega Crorepathi was a sure watch… That was the first of its kind and so gathered immense popularity for the show as well as its anchor. It was a national programme and people from all over India watched it. After so many years, the quiz show now is officially implemented in many regional languages with its regional stars. In tamil, “Main Amitabh Bachhan bol raha hoon” was replaced by “Vanakkam, naan Surya pesaren”… Computerji became “genius” and “Lock” became “fix”. But rest all, music, set, even costume was designed similarly.

So Surya was all set to take charge. His fans (mostly girls) remarked “Ohhhhh Surya” , His critics remarked “He is bad with talking with people… Lets see how he pulls it through” So somehow or the other people started watching it….

What I really don’t understand is that, when the contestant wins the first “fast fingers” round, the participant goes into a psychic spree… Jumping , dancing and shouting all of a sudden, scaring the kids watching the show as well as Surya himself. Then, there will be a video clip played about the contestant. It will mostly have the same effect of Raju’s house in 3 idiots. The psychic spree will turn into a crying spree  Surya will play a politician’s role, listening to problems patiently and finally soothe them with words. Uncles and aunties who are watching the show will wipe their eyes, seeing the contestant’s problems and TRP rockets up 

Every girl who comes to the show, invariably says she’s a die hard fan (its a small word to describe ) of Surya and goes ahead to prove the fact with incidents and facts while her mother beams proudly seeing her daughter. During the course of the play Surya starts addressing contestant’s mother as amma and emotionally getting closer, thus getting thenamma Surya title in every household. 

This programme has created a huge impact. So much so that, my mom asked me what do you want for lunch?(a) Pulav (b) Roti (c) Sambar rice (d) You will eat in canteen. In a hurry instead of choosing (b) I chose (d) and ended up starring at the menu board of HSB that gave me four other options (a) Fixed meals (b) Special meals (c) Quick lunch (d) North Indian thaali…. Somehow with lifeline (instead of phone-a-friend I asked my friend who was near) my decision was made and I sat eating the lunch. I thought it ended there,  while we went to pantry, I immediately chose tea in order to avoid options but still wasn’t spared. My friend went on to ask What do you want? (a)Ginger tea (b) Cardamom tea (c)Masala tea and (d) Assam tea… Ufffff 

Atleast this is much better, one of my nephew was asked a question in school… He immediately asked for lifelines to his teacher. This created news (thanks to Graham Bell for finding telephone) and the kid was branded as “how cute”… “how smart”… Had I done it in school my mom would have given me a “tight slap” for disobeying the teacher and would have been branded as a “bad child”.

So has television influenced us even in our day-to-day life. Our routine tends to revolve around the the programmes and timings. Reality shows though we know its fake and made up, we still end up watching the contestants abusing eachother proving the “reality” factor. Serials continue, continue and continue… But we still watch it and hoping against hope that it will end atleaast by this month. News channels are no exceptions… They have become more like reality shows these days!

Well, am not telling, not to watch TV… Just that lets not have it as the only entertainment and let it be a part of entertainment. Whatever changes happen, the craze for film stars never change. We forget that they are also like us and acting is a profession they have chosen. But no, we still see and idiolize each star as he appears on screen and treat him even equal to God.

Ok… Now the bottomline is… the choice is yours whether to be the same or change… Make decisions wisely…. No lifelines allowed 

Incredible India

As I have always told, whenever we plan something for weekend… It never happens  The same happened this weekend too… I had charted out a long to-do list… As soon as I was done, my mom came up to me and informed that am accompanying her to the market! First blow to my to-do list as soon as it was made… okay.. I pacified myself that its just an hour’s work (though I was sure it would take up the entire evening  ) and set out to the market.

I was really excited as we had almost finished all the work within an hour and we were about to return home… At that time “Helllooo!!!” A chirpy voice exclaimed. I turned back, but to my dismay couldn’t recognize her! Before I could conclude she mistook us for somebody else, my mom responded in the same excited voice… “Hellooo! It has been ages since I saw you”. I had exactly  look on my face and kept gazing back and forth at mom and that lady… From the conversation, I understood she had returned from her exile, “Vidheshvaas”, after 10 years…After a while, the lady finally noticed me and remarked “Is this your daughter? Oh! My God (seeing this exclamation I didn’t know how to react and continued my expression)… I saw her when she was so small (her hand showed that “small” expression too small… a size that was humanely impossible)…Now she has become this big… I couldn’t recognize her at all” (The rate of growth discussion, made me feel like a pet animal  ) When my mom was finally bidding her bye, she became over-affectionate and nagged us to come home…I kept pressing my mom’s hand to show my protest… My mom coolly replied “I’ll come some other time… My daughter has some work it seems”. The lady threw my a so-chweet kind of smile and said “Am sure 10 minutes can’t ruin your work”. I threw an angry look at my mom and forced that “cho-chweet” smile on my face too and followed her.

As soon as we entered her house… she started fanning with her hand and rushed towards her AC switch “Habba! I don’t know how you people survive here… Its so hot! Can’t be without AC for a single second”. She left us for getting juice, my mom got up to follow her to the kitchen… I pulled my mom back to the couch and whispered (angrily) “who is she?” My mom’s explanation couldn’t expel my ignorance… So I jumped to next question “Why is she overacting?”. My mom gave me that behave-yourself look and told “She lived in US for 15 years. Now her husband has got transfer to India, to be with his parents (who lived in a floor below them… And not in their house ). My mom justified her acts saying so sad… It will be difficult for them to get accustomed to India”.

She brought 2 glass full of orange juice… While I picked a glass, she added “Ufff! The water here is so dirty… The packaged drinking water that is available is unfit even for washing dishes. That’s why I make my friends there to  send these juices. We can’t completely stop drinking this water but whenever possible I avoid using it!” This made me realize am drinking an imported juice and shouldn’t waste. The “health drink” tasted bad !

She insisted that she showed us around her house. All the while she kept complaining about everything possible. She said “My kids eat only healthy foods… But what’s healthy here? We, there eat only cream coffee, cheese(some cheese, that I couldn’t decipher ), etc…Here, the food is so unhealthy”. I blurted out “Research shows 90% kids in foreign countries are only obese. We Indians, though we eat unhealthy, we stay healthy.” I continued looking at my “healthy” juice glass as I didn’t want that behave-yourself look from my mom.

The lady managed “smart girl” remark for which my mom proudly started narrating my career growth. She listened to this and threw a bouncer at me for my previous remark.What’s your daughter’s age? and that very same I know-a-guy-story… A typical matrimonial ad! My mom gave her usual answer saying “We are not looking for a match as of now”. This matrimonial ad made me more furious and the cold war intensified.

At the peak of the cold war, somebody rang the bell… 2 kids (proving my point about foreign kids are obese) rushed in.. I couldn’t help giggling! She explained how her kids have become so “weak” coming here…”The roads are so polluted. The school and kids here are so unhygienic.  Every now and then these little(who were not little) kids fall sick”. My mom had to give that artificial so-sad expression. I looked at my mom and both of us controlled our giggle. She asked her kids “Do you want some cookies and milk?” In a sing song way… In the same way, they replied “Yeah mom”.

We were standing in the balcony, so I conviniently turned towards the road and started laughing. Finally she got the “imported” cookies(which is nothing but our butter biscuits). The kid was standing next to me in the balcony. “Don’t stand there for long, its so dusty! Come in…” She looked at me and said “Look at the road.. In US and all it looks spic and span… Like a mirror”… While telling this, she was busy opening the carton containing cookies… She gave the cookies to the kid, offered me some , squashed the box and threw it down from the balcony, instructing her kid to go eat inside as it is dirty out.

I could stand no more. I remarked “What to do aunty… Even people who have stayed in foreign for years together still remain “Indian” in their ways. They still throw waste on road but complain India is dirty.”  She gave a sheepish smile. I assumed the role of Aamir khan inSathyameva Jayate and continued my speech “As you said, India is bad… Even though foreigners and the half foreigners…That’s NRIs return back here… stay here, eat here but still complain… We continue to let them stay here as we believe in Athithi Devo Bhava… This doesn’t happen anywhere else in the world.  Incredible India”

I knew I was a bit rude, but couldn’t help it! It is depressing to know, Indians (few), themselves talking bad about India. Then, how can we expect others to respect us? I really wish this attitude of ours changes.  Instead of complaining about what’s bad, we can take a step to make that bad turn good. We have to believe we are the best, then only we can make others believe the same.

'Super'-stition...still continues to be super???

Few days back, I read a news article where an elder brother killed a pet cat of his younger brother as it always crossed him while he left the house and so he didn’t get his job… Immediately, the younger brother killed his elder brother for killing his pet and is now in jail. Though this incident made me laugh and term it ‘silly’,  I am still not able to digest this has happened in a ‘civilized’ nation. Have beliefs and superstitions overshadowed the value of life?

First of all my biggest doubt is, who named it ‘superstition’?… I don’t understand what is ‘super’ about it. Anyways, we are known for our deep rooted and varied culture. This made beliefs also vary and multiply throughout the world.

 They say if somebody sneezes when some new event is starting or while going out… Its unlucky and the event should be postponed  But if the person is suffering from common cold or flu…. What happens?  Moreover, in country like India, where we breathe dust rather than air… if we don’t sneeze, then its a bad omen according to me as the dust will get deposited in your lungs and it is a sign that you have to get ready for medical bills  

 The question ‘Where are you going?’ is sure to bring some dirty looks at you. It is considered that when this question is asked while leaving, the job for which the person is leaving is not going to succeed. But my question is why do people throw dirty looks at me when I ask where are you going, though its just restroom for which they are leaving?  No comments 

 If you cough or get hiccups, it is believed that somebody is thinking about you. Whenever I cough, due to food getting into wind pipe… My friends will be busy teasing or winking at me rather than giving water  But, if this is the case, celebrities like Obama, Sachin, Messi etc. should always keep coughing as someone or the other will keep thinking about them around the world. Poor them ! 

 I heard that itching of palm will get money. From that day onwards I started itching my palm especially when my mom and dad where seeing. My plan was, showing this as a reason and getting money from them. But result: My mom got me a new medicated soap and also warned if the itch continues she’ll have to take me to a dermatologist… Plan flop 

 The cat crossing  is considered inauspicious and leads to cancellation of events… Then my attendance to my company should be 0%..  There are so many cats near my house, if they don’t cross me, then its an unusual thing.

According to me, these superstitions must have started during the time when our ancestors were very dependent on nature. These beliefs mostly revolved around animals and nature. When a person falls sick, they didn’t have the facility or knowledge for the improved medication. The illness and death was beyond our knowledge , but still had to reason it out  somehow …. This resulted in blaming, the day, time, events that occurred before the person succumbed to illness… We always blame others for our doings, thus the animals and nature that could hardly complain if we blame became our targets. Those days, starting for a journey is considered to be an important event and special poojas and auspicious time and date was charted out for the travel. The vehicles available was only a bullock cart (which was for the rich), others travelled by walk. In order to overcome the hardships that one might face, these superstitions came into practice. Many superstitions have brought dreadful results leading to even death.This continued and is continuing even today.

With the advancement in technology and steady growth of literacy rates, we expected that these  beliefs will finally change. But no, the irony is, we modified the beliefs according to the modern days and the superstition continued. In west, which boasts of being so developed, still exists buildings without 13th floor. After 12, its 14, confusing all the mathematicians about the missing 13. In cricketing world, it is predominant, we have heard about cricketers wanting a particular numbered jersey or a particular bat for a match.

Beliefs, from its word, is some thing we belief. So unless and until our beliefs doesn’t affect or hurt others, its fine . But the moment, it interferes with others freedom or beliefs… its warning bells! Its high time we sit back and figure out a way out of this .

Oops! Its been 13  minutes since I started writing the post and would be posting it now … HACHHOOO … Sneeze too… Wonder how the post is going to turn out