Wednesday 31 August 2016

The Art of bargaining

“I am your Best friend da..You should give atleast 10 chocolates extra”
“I have got only 50 chocolates. *refers the No. on roll and No. present on the blackboard and uses fingers to count the extra chocolates available*
‘I will give you 3 extra’ in an apologetic tone.
“Ok da… Give me 5.. Done! But I will tell that thimiru pudicha Rahul that you gave me 10 *both hi5 finalizing the deal*

And thus, begins our journey of excelling in the art of bargaining. From that day onwards, we are moulded and transformed to ask, re-ask and then give in :P Be it bargaining for extra 5 minutes if you are being woken up or bargaining for an extra pan-puri, we are always on our toes to deliver excellence :P

Why is it called Bargain :roll: “Bar”-”Gain”… Is it to denote that the result can make a person to feel high and to get addicted to it :roll: Anyway, lets leave out the etymology for experts to ponder :P With my close cousin’s wedding round the corner, we are totally roaming around the streets of TNagar…If you find anyone looking like me, roaming on the roads of Pondy Bazaar without the slightest bother about the scotching sun overhead , you can stop and tell a hi…It will be me *completely at your own risk…I am not responsible if you get slapped by someone* :P Such kind of huge shopping spree is an indirect test to your bargaining ability. It’s all about how you manage. You talk, they talk, you talk , again they talk *goes on * and after a while,you should have the final say. Mid summer Sun, balancing shopping bags and at the same time bargaining with full josh….You should drink 3 Dhoni mug full of Boost to keep your stamina up without dropping till the end of the day. My mom is an expert in this field…No, not in drinking Boost but in the art of bargaining…If a phD is offered, she would have got it for sure .

Scenario: When I go shopping with my friend/cousin
Seller: Totally Rs550 Me: Anna Anna…550 is too much for this anna… Make it 450 anna pls *repeated use of Anna to touch the emotional side* Seller: Ok ma.. for your sake I’ll make it 500…Final price *Feels very happy and special , picks up the product and leaves the shop feeling victorious* Recreating the same scenario

*initial small talk and gaining the confidence of the seller that you are a regular customer* Seller: Totally Rs550
Mom: *Rechecks the bill value like my maths teacher correcting my paper* Rs150… Not worth more than that.
I will exit the scene and stand at a safe distance from them due to the fear of getting beaten
Seller: That is not even my cost price… Rs450 *will pack and handover as a lame try to finish it*
Mom: Rs.200… That’s all! If not ok… leave it!
Seller: Madam madam… Atleast pay Rs 300! *Tempo lam vechi kadathirkom modulation*
Mom: okay…Here you go, Rs 250! I’m giving Rs.50 more just cos I’m a regular customer to your shop but it is not worth more than Rs.200 … but you are a sweet boy and I’m seeing you for so many years.*ultimate weapon*
Seller: *smiles forgetting the scenario* handovers the bag taking Rs.250. My mom will take the bag and again do small talk which will be useful next time ;)
She will victoriously handover the bag to me and say ‘Had you been there, you would have happily paid Rs. 500 and bought it’ !

So there are these 3 categories of people … ‘People who are experts in this art (like my mom), people who know to bargain but are not upto the mark (like me) and finally people who end up doing reverse bargaining like this aunt of mine. She is this soft and sweet person who doesn’t even know to scold people. Till today, I have never seen her raising her voice for anything. She had gone to the road side seller selling lemons
*gives Rs 5*
Seller: 5 for Rs10 but I will give you 4 for Rs 5
My aunt *with full confidence*: Will you give 3 for Rs 5? If not keep it!
*Seller shock* *Aunt rocks*
Her friend had to re-state the fact that he is giving 4 in place of 3 which is 1 more than what she was expecting :P Till today, we tease her with that incident :lol:


That’s all from me for now... Let me go and do reverse bargaining with my mom :P
Mom : 5 rotis
Me: no... 3
Mom: (finally surrendering).. u should have 4 ;)

Tuesday 30 August 2016

[Blogatheme - Tragedy] ~[55 Fiction] ~The Choice!

He picked it up, his curious eyes gleaming with happiness His tiny hands have found a treasure to keep He tucked the one-eyed-tattered teddy under his left arm And went about picking up the rags from the usual garbage bin, But now with a smile and a frequent look at his new found friend.

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 She looked at the stranger staring at her in the mirror Her fingers ran down her cheeks reaching her bruised lip She found a lone tear making its way through She quickly brushed it aside before the world could see it And got ready faking a smile on her lips to face the cruel world.

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When the sun showed its face out, She was busy sweeping the roads clean She has to finish before the traffic begins Just then she glimpsed at the bus in front Her eyes clouded and she choked not cos of the dust But by the memories of her dear ones that went away.

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These are three 55 fictions for the theme ‘Tragedy’. The first one was a real incident that I saw at ECR, Chennai. My heart grew heavy seeing the joy on the little one’s face when he held the tattered doll. I wished with all my heart that every kid could get the little little joys of his childhood that he/she deserved. Second and third ones are left to your interpretation as they are also based on real incidents.

Thursday 25 August 2016

[Historical Fiction] ~Pages from my expedition

“I see a piece of land in about two hours of sailing on smooth sea towards the north”, announced, Gregoran. He was the oldest and wisest of all and a few say he is blessed with mystical powers by the Gods lying below. I’m no believer of Gods but I believe in his wisdom and sense of navigation. From a tender age, I have been living in the sea, travelling with Gregoran. I’m called Christopher. I have no past and I have no future. We will be reaching a new land shortly. We have been to many pieces of lands and seen people far and wide. A few treated us with fear , a few despised us and a handful loved us. Smugglers, traders, pirates, Kings of the sea, explorers, whatever be the name, we are the ones who sail far and wide. The ones who look beyond what our eyes can show. We are the sailors from far and beyond. As predicted by Gregoran, we have almost reached the land. We got ready to dock the boats and unload the goods that we have got. We sharpened our knives, just in case of need. The place looked deserted. We walked with our goods and found a dry spot. We decided to stay there for the night and cook dinner. Being in the sea for months together has made cooked food a luxury, that we look forward to relish. We gathered around the fire that Jason and other younger lads prepared and were getting ready for the feast. The lads stopped singing all of a sudden and we saw shadows fall on our feast. We were tied and taken few miles away. A line of houses that had circular roofs with leaves from what looked like palm covered over it, lined our paths . We were taken to the biggest of all houses where we saw a bearded man dressed in animal-skin , braided hair and unusually long beard. He was majestic and it went without saying that he is the king or leader of this piece of land. The other braided, bearded men looked at us with doubt and disgust. Finally, Gregoran broke the silence, “O Lord! We are the sailors from seas far and beyond. We bring berries, nuts, stones and gold from larger countries. We would like to stay and trade them here. Permit us, dear Lord!”. The look on his face remained unchanged while a guy from the crowd, who looked like one us, a foreigner in their land walked up to their leader and whispered into his ears. He looked at us and with a strong accent, “Our leader would like to see the goods before permitting you to stay.” I rushed and returned with bags as many as I could carry. The bearded men examined and shouted “Batata”. We were unclear what that meant but it brought a smile on the leader’s face and he whispered something into the foreigner’s ears. In return, he looked at us and spoke the words “Welcome to Xaymaca”. We were treated like rulers of Kingdom in the days to follow. Good food, homes to stay and trade, everything was sanctioned. The Chieftain would visit us every now and then , however, the foreigner accompanied him always. The foreigner, whose name we later came to know as Mirion, was asked to say at a place next to us to help us with the trade as we were not familiar with the local tongue. Trade prospered and we made more than expected profit. At dusk, one fine day, we were closing the trade for the day and got down to clear the goods . Just then I heard a woman hail and found people running in that direction already. We quickly rushed with our knives tucked in. We saw a boy lying on the shore, his body turning blue which grew darker and darker with every passing minute. We were prohibited from going any near to him. Mirion stood next to us and said he has been poisoned by a most harmful weed and he is actually dead. We found the Chieftain ordering men to get something. A woman placed the boy on her lap and started whispering looking up at the sky. Soon, the crowd joined the chant . A bearded man rushed with a neatly carved wooden box. As the Chieftain opened the box and the place glowed with a faint light. He took out three large blue stones and gave it one after the other to the woman. She placed one on his head, one on his chest and another on his stomach. She continued with her chant now louder. The stones grew brighter and brighter and filled the entire place with light. After a while, the brightness was decreasing and it returned to its usual state. The boy opened his eyes and gasped for breath. That night, we lay wide awake in our shelter. Jason asked Gregoran the question that was in all of our minds. “What happened there? Was it a miracle?” Gregoran sat up and laughed. “Aye! Miracle! A miracle to see such a precious stone in my lifetime. It is a very rare stone that can drink up any poison and burn it from your body.” “How much is it worth?” “Hundreds and hundreds of bags of gold”. We all looked at each other with the same thought. Jason volunteered, “I will bring that wooden box from Chieftain’s place when he is out for his evening rounds to visit. You ready the boats. We flee once I’m back”. A usual pang of guilt filled me as we are going to steal from the people who gave us food water and shelter but it was overcome by the thought of gold. We agreed to his plan. The next day, everything went us planned. Jason brought the wooden box as promised. We were ready to flee the place when Mirion blocked our way with his knife drawn out and in position. Immediately a brawl broke out. As we managed to rush to our boats, the bearded braided men surrounded us. We were trapped from all sides. The bearded man snatched the wooden box . I was hit on my head and I blacked out. When I woke up, were in a dark stuffy place. We were not sure whether it was day or night. I asked Gregoran who I assumed was sitting next to me, “How many days have passed?” He said it could be 3 or 4 . Since all of us were dying without food or water, I decided to take a call and rely on my instincts. I had met a friend, a guy who knew about the sky and sea during the last voyage. He had taught me to calculate lunar eclipse as it would be useful during sailing. I managed to find a rough date of occurrence of the next lunar eclipse. I screamed my lungs out till I was taken before the Chieftain. I knelt before him, “O Lord! You have made our Sea Gods angry. Gregoran is the son of Sea God . You have tortured the sons of the sea. You will now suffer the wrath of our Gods. Our sea Gods would take away your moon in the next few days.” Chieftain spat at me angrily and I was taken to the dark place again. From then, I kept the track of days and finally the day I predicted neared. The Chieftain and other people came running to the place where we were kept prisoners, lamenting and shouting for mercy. As predicted, the moon was totally eclipsed. I consoled the Chieftain and said , “O Lord! Gregoran and I will have to talk to my Gods in private and would plead for mercy. In return I want my fellow sailors to be freed and a grand farewell to be given to us.” Gregoran clearly knew my plan . We waited in a private place while Gregoran was keeping a track of the hour glass with him. Exactly at the 48th minute, we went out. “O Lord! The Gods have listened to our prayers and your moon will be returned. Kneel before the Sea God and repent your sins. You will be pardoned.” As soon as the Chieftain and the people knelt before the sea, the moon started to reappear. People were jubilant and thanked us profusely. We were given bags of gifts and food that would last for months before we bid farewell and set out into the sea. The lads still think it is the mystical power of Gregoran that freed us. At times, I, Christopher Columbus, can let the Gods take credit! ————————————————————————————————————————— Note: Colombus entered Jamaica in 1494. Prior to that it was inhabited by Taino tribes. “Batata” refers to sweet potato. This post is a mix of fiction and facts.